Dear Agony Auntie,

My name is Neil. For some reason, women always seem to bring me to my knees.

Can you offer any explanation for this?

Thanx in advance,

Illustration Friday - Subtract

This is what you get if you subtract the writing from my recent biog! I had to give a written description of myself, including any convictions, parking tickets and membership of the WI to the organisers of the Shrewsbury Cartoon Festival. This is a picture of myself done in my style. Any of you who have seen me in the flesh (or, indeed, clothed) may notice a passing resemblance ...

Amidst all the doom and gloom ...

This message comes courtesy of Royston Robertson and is a very welcome antidote to all the bad news - current, future and speculative - which graces every media manifestation these days. We can't do anything about the news, except maybe stop listening to it. There are limits to what we can do about our current situation. But there's an awful lot we can do about our 'inner landscapes', whether we view ourselves as victims or realise that there are opportunities in there.

But if you find drawing just depresses you, cos of not being an arty type, try something else instead. Simple!

Dear Agony Auntie,

My name is Matt. For some reason, women seem to walk all over me.

Have you any idea why this should be?

Illustration Friday - Legendary

Wayland's Smithy was the name given to a megalithic chambered tomb by the invading Saxons. Wayland was their smith-god. According to legend, if anyone left their horse tethered outside the monument overnight, and a silver penny on the capstone of the tomb, they would return in the morning to find their horse shod and the money gone.

The problem with this arrangement was that you never got to have any say in the style of the horse shoes ...

Dear Agony Auntie,

I decided I needed some new makeup, as it will mean it will be easier to catch and keep a man. Also, makeup is one of my main hobbies. Also, I hadn't bought any since the previous day. So I was long overdue for some new makeup.

At the makeup counter in a well-known department store I met a really nice man. We had so much in common. We even like the same brand of nail varnish! We chatted for half an hour, I helped him select some false eyelashes with a green glitter finish (he tried on several pairs), and he helped me to decide which type of foundation was ideally suited to my skin tone. We got on so well. But he never asked me out on a date!

Are all men like this? Or did I do something wrong?

Yours,

The lady in the cartoon on here dated September 26th 2008

P.S. Last week I met a frog. Even I could tell he was a frog. I told him to hop it.

Illustration Friday - Intricate

The intricately patterned handbag had a purpose beyond that of carrying life's essentials ...